Two Years

Today marks two years since Dad went home to be with the Lord.  He was an amazing Godly man who made anyone around him better.

This past weekend I made a quick drip up to DC to Arlington Cemetery to visit his resting place.  I'm so proud and honored that my dad rests in Arlington with thousands of our country's finest.

I'm so blessed to have had 29 years with this wonderful man!  As a Daddy and as a friend.

The hardest part is the ache I feel that my children won't know their Grandpa Ray.  That is what hurts the most.

A Place with a View

After three months it was time to make the trip to DC to bury Dad in Arlington National Cemetery.  Due to the war there is a three month wait for burials.  After 28 years in the Air Force he was entitled to a burial with full military honors.

During his last week with us we discussed where he wanted to be buried, when we suggested Arlington he got a sweet grin on this face and said he would like that.   On January 5, 2011 Col. Ray Vitkus received a full military burial in Arlington National Cemetery.  He has a beautiful view of the Potomac River and the Pentagon.  This is very appropriate since he worked at the Pentagon for a number of years.

We were blessed to have so many friends and family attend the service to show their love for dad.  After the service we had a reception at our old church.  It was amazing to be able to see so many of our friends from years ago.  There were even a hand full of people that had worked with dad or for dad over the years.

The service was perfect.  The Air Force honor guard did a wonderful job.  It was very moving.  The 21 gun salute and playing of "Taps" was very emotional.

Ray Vitkus' Burial Details

You are invited to join us for a celebration of Ray's life and burial January 5th, 2011.

Burial Details:

Arlington National Cemetery

1 Memorial Drive, Arlington, VA 

The service starts at 9am but you need to be there no later than 8:30am.  If you aren't used to DC traffic, make sure you give yourself LOTS of time to get there.

When you enter the cemetery tell the guard that you are there for the Ray Vitkus funeral.  The guard will then direct you to the Administrative building to line up.  From there we will all process behind the casket to the burial site.  He will be receiving a full military burial with the platoon escort, gun salute and band (weather permitting).  Please dress warmly as it will be outside and cold. 

Reception

Columbia Baptist Church

103 West Columbia Street

Falls Church, VA 22046-3482

A reception will be held at Columbia immediately following the burial service (Around 10:30am).  This will allow us all to gather in the warm and share stories about Ray.  Hors d'oeuvres will be served.  

Please RSVP to Kerry at vitkus72@hotmail.com if you plan to attend by January 1, 2011.

We hope to see you in January to celebrate an amazing man!

Love,

Kerry, Mary and Pam

Funeral Arrangements

Raymond Allen Vitkus

A visitation will be held at Williford Funeral Home, Wednesday, September 29, 2010 from 6-8pm. 

201 E Academy St
Fuquay Varina, NC 27526-2248
(919) 552-2211

www.willifordfuneralhome.com

Funeral services will be conducted at Fuquay Varina United Methodist Church on Thursday, September 30, 2010 at 11am. 

100 S Judd Pkwy SE
Fuquay-Varina, NC 27526
(919) 552-4331

www.fvumc.org

Interment will take place at Arlington National Cemetery on January 5, 2011.  Further details to follow closer to the date. 

In lieu of flowers, donations can be made to the American Legion Scholarship fund in the name of Raymond Vitkus. 

Well Done

Well done good and faithful servant - well done.

Ray Vitkus went to be with the Lord peacefully on Saturday September 25, 2010 at 5:45pm.  Mom, Mary and I were all there with him as he passed.  

Dad slept all day today and was never conscience.  Last night before bed he said he loved us, kissed mom goodnight and wanted his picture taken with a big smile on his face. 

Throughout this whole process he has been the example of what it means to faithfully chase after God.  Even today we had nurses coming in wanting to talk about dad's faith. Amazing!

Mary and I are spending the night with mom at mom's house tonight.  Tomorrow we will start to get things together and organized.  Monday we will finalize the funeral and burial arrangements.  I will let you all know the plans once we have them set. 

We continue to appreciate your prayers as this will be a long process for us all.  We are happy for dad but sad for us. 

A different day

Dad has been in the hospital since a week ago Wednesday, so this is day 10.   Mom, Mary and I have all been here since Monday.  The week has been a blessing for us.  Our family has been able to come and visit dad and say their goodbyes.  We have had great talks and laughed a lot.  The last four days have been such a gift!  It is time we will never get back and always remember.

God has also been present this week in everything.  We have had several God moments where it was clear He is in control and using dad for His glory.

Today has been a different day that last last few.  Dad is showing signs of wearing down.  He has been tired and a little fuzzy headed.  We will see what the next few days bring.

We continue to feel your love and prayers.  It has been such a gift to talk to so many of you via email, facebook, and phone calls.  We feel so loved.  

As this journey comes to an end, know that we are all confident in God's plan and know that He is in control.  

"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28

Hospital Party

Even though we are going through this really hard time we have been having a party here at the hospital.  It seems strange to be on a cancer unit with people who are at the end of their life and we are laughing.  Dad has so much joy and peace about his situation.  He is witnessing to anyone that will stand in the room long enough to listen.  We have even had a Dr. come in and say dad's attitude encouraged her to have a religious conversation with her mom.  Mom has also "friended" one of our nurses on Facebook.

This has been a roller coaster of emotions.  At the beginning of the week we thought that it was over.  So we all came to the hospital, said our good byes and tried to prepare ourselves.  But God isn't done with dad yet.

We have really been blessed with this opportunity to be together as a family.  Mom, Dad, Mary and I haven't been just the four of us since 1999.

Dying is a very difficult thing, but dad is doing it with style.

Staying strong

We are lucky to still have dad here hanging out with us.  His breathing has finally stabilized and he doesn't have to think about breathing anymore.  He is on 100% oxygen with a face mask and morphine.  The combination seems to be working wonderfully.  Part of "comfort care" means no IV fluids or TPN or vitals being taken or blood drawn.  So at this point he basically just gets oxygen and antibiotics.  He says he isn't in any pain and that we are "partying". 

Mom, Mary and I have all been here since Monday afternoon.  It has been really good family bonding time.  We have watched movies, laughed, and reminisced about family adventures.  Our wonderful husbands have been taking over full time kid care so we can be here with Mom and Dad.  They have brought the kids to visit each day. 

This whole process has been hard, wonderful, and a blessing.  Each day is a gift.  Dad has been sharing his faith with everyone.  It is clear that God is using dad even now.

Thank you all for your continued prayers and support.  They really do make a difference.  It is so amazing to know we have friends all over the world who love us and who have been impacted by dad. 

Comfort Care - A Dad update

Dear ones,

We have been assured that the doctors have done all that can be done for Ray. There are no other procedures that can be done at this time that will cause Ray to regain his breathing health.  The girls are spending the night with us here in the hospital.  Ray consented to comfort care that will remove any further testing and treatments other than what is needed for his comfort.  The TPN will be discontinued after tonight so that it does not add any extra fluid to his lungs.

Ray is at peace with all of this and feels the love and joy from his family, friends and mostly his God.

We have been and are still so grateful for your prayers and continual concern for Ray and our family.  God has blessed us through this season of cancer by your prayers, words of comfort and reflections on how this season in our lives has affected yours.  God does make good out of evil and that is so true in this case.

Ray is not and will not be in any pain, but our prayer is that he will remain comfortable as long as he is with us.  He is currently enjoying some yummy chocolate ice cream and juice.  It is the first food he has had in a few days.  

We have all decided to have a service here in NC and burial at Arlington National Cemetery when the time comes.  We will advise you at a later time.

With love,

Ray, Kerry, Mary & Pam

An update on my dad

To this point I have kept this blog about our happy family adventures and about our sweet princess.  But since many of you also know my parents I wanted to post this email update my mom wrote about my dad's current health (see below).  


A short summary is that my dad was diagnosed with colon cancer in 2004.  He had surgery and did chemo.  In 2008 the cancer came back and they did more chemo.  He had a very big operation in early 2009 that took out most of his small and large intestines and some other organs.  Dad had a bad infection from the surgery and it has taken over a year to heal.  The cancer is growing and has attached to a number of organs.  He has been doing well and has had good energy until recently.


My father is a Christ follower who loves the Lord.  He is a glass "half full" kind of guy.  Even cancer can't get him down!

Grandpa and Cali watching cartoons together 2 weeks ago

Precious Friends and Family,

Ray and I want to thank you for your great faithfulness in your prayers for Ray.  After the July diagnosis, Ray was doing very well but showed increasing signs of tiredness.  We assumed it was due to the medications and ofter affects of the new chemo treatments. He also had a decrease in appetite and he was always cold.

This past weekend was my last weekend at our sweet church in Henderson due to Ray’s declining health. During that weekend, Ray starting to experience some acid reflux, vomiting and severe pain. On Monday, our local doctor ordered x-rays, but by Wednesday morning, we had not gotten authorization from our insurance company so I asked the doctor for authorization to go to the ER.  From Western Wake Hospital all day to a transport late at night to UNC Hospital in Chapel Hill Cancer Center until Thursday morning where Ray was showing some respirator difficulty we ended up in the MICU in the main hospital at UNC for a day and a half.  Ray returned to the Cancer Center yesterday and will stay here for several more days.

The status now is antibiotics to fight the pneumonia, oxygen to keep his oxygen level above 90% (low was 78%), no food by mouth to rest the bowel and evaluate on Monday how to proceed from here.  The attending physician for the weekend and our oncologist are considering a G tube to drain the gastric fluid out of Ray’s stomach.  This would be a permanent change and that would have Ray on liquids from now on along with the TPN and IV saline. This is a big change for Ray, but he is already thinking about all of the liquids he can enjoy and many of them start with the adjective, chocolate. 

Ray no longer has any pain, is breathing better and resting well. He is also the favorite patient on the floor.  I heard that MICU did not want to let him go.  I think this is true for all that know him.

Please continue to keep Ray and our family in your prayers as we face the days ahead.  God has blessed us with these extra special months with Ray and memories have been made.  It is my hope for at least one more Christmas as it is Ray’s favorite holiday.

God’s Richest Blessings on all of you!

Kerry


We have a Facebook Group page for dad if you want to join.